 by Hillary Rubesin, PhD, LIMHP, REAT A few weeks ago, I was in a virtual supervision session with a newly-graduated clinician who is working towards her Expressive Arts Therapy registration. She began our time together with a question: “Do you ever experience self-doubt?” I laughed. Fifteen years as a fully-licensed therapist, and I still regularly question myself. My supervisee breathed out, relieved. We processed her exhaustion following long workdays trying to “mindread” and stay “ahead” of her clients’ thinking. “What if, instead of trying to stay ‘ahead’ of our clients, we focused on ‘being with’?” One week later, I was in between client sessions, doubting myself. I turned to a deck of “Soul Cards” purchased in graduate school after a powerful training in an arts-based process called “Touch Drawing.” I pulled the following card, and quickly tried to make sense of the image.  Before I had the chance to self-analyze (ha!), my next client arrived. She entered the office and began telling me about her previous week. Suddenly, she paused. “I read this poem last night and it made me think of you. Could I share it?” “Of course!” I agreed, always welcoming the arts. She began to read from her phone: A bald eagle called out to another as mag-pies attacked their nest. Someone called it romantic. I believed her. The magpies, the ferryman, God, the poets, everything seemed romantic in Alaska, where people breathed out white birds. (Excerpt from A Woman With A Bird, by Victoria Chang) I stared at her, dumbfounded. “I have to show you something.” I pulled out the card. She gasped. “WHAT?!?! What does it mean??” “I have no idea!” I blurted out. I paused before speaking again, just being with her, in the magic. “Maybe it means that when we truly trust ourselves, we are brought to who and where we’re supposed the be. Maybe self-trust allows us to connect more fully with others. Maybe this is where we find magic again.” The following night, a wooden box fell, inexplicably, from my bookshelf. It had sat there for years, rarely touched. Startled, I began putting the contents (art supplies and little trinkets) back inside. I noticed a small message had also fallen out, alongside the other contents. It read, The Magic Box Each one of us holds a certain magic within. The magic box is the keeper of this magic for the person who believes in themselves and trusts in their own magic. You can share the magic with everyone with a smile. As you journey through life, the magic will never leave you. Your magic will be here forever.  Journey on, my friends. Trust your own magic.
Dr. Hillary Rubesin has limited openings in her private practice for clients as well as for clinicians seeking supervision in Expressive Arts Therapy. Please reach out to her at [email protected].
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