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PRACTICING MINDFULNESS:
THE CENTER FOR MINDFUL LIVING PRACTITIONERS' BLOG

Presence and Monologues

3/28/2022

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by Pamela Mueggenberg LMHP, MA

“The most precious gift we can offer others is our presence. When mindfulness embraces those we love, they bloom like flowers.”
– Thich Nhat Hanh 
“I’m making a nether garden inside my house where I can grow netherwort and I thought it took netherrack but it didn’t so I tried nethersoil and that didn’t work either and then I thought aha, its soulsand and it worked and now I have 64 netherworts what’s your favorite Minecraft plant, I like the coral reef but you can’t get bees down there.” - my 8 year old son

We all have monologues inside us. Grand speeches we practice in the shower for our next work meeting, or titillating date with our new favorite person, or a frankly dynamite and awe inspiring screed against the oppression of daylight savings. When we are able to sit with someone who fully hears our words, our story, we experience their mind and our mind connecting - a healing channel between us that helps us both more fully embrace our shared experience and human worth. We can pour our monologue out into the shared space, and our companion can marvel at our creation. The experience can be sacred.

But we are a reciprocal species. We learn best through give and take, sharing information through the interplay of two minds as they push and pull an idea into something new. We long to be heard just as much, if not more, as we desire our beloveds to be heard by us. To put it more bluntly, sometimes you just want to get a word in!

In certain situations, that’s just not what needs to happen. My beautiful child has clearly told me that when he is talking Minecraft he is “talking out my thoughts as they come in my head and I don’t want you to talk back because it mixes up all my ideas.” So I am quiet, and I listen, and I marvel, and I can see his imagination in real time as it creates and discards ideas as fluidly as a sculptor at the wheel.

So what is our place here, as we are quiet, and listening, and marveling? It is easy to feel swept up in another’s story, to lose sense of ourselves or our voice as another is stretching theirs. Where is the reciprocity that we value so deeply?

To fully celebrate the seemingly paradoxical reciprocity of listening to another person speak without pause is to acknowledge the power of the listener, of the witness. These monologues cannot be heard, in that moment, if we choose not to listen; they would simply not exist.

We are important, and we can be cherished as such. As we breathe in, we inhale the rate, the cadence, the message of this person’s words. As we breathe out we explore our own body and mind, give ourselves the space, love, and energy we need in that moment. When you tire, when your brain gets full, you are able then to compassionately connect with your person and let them know when the conversation needs to shift without eliciting defensiveness or shame.

In the meantime, breathe in your beloved. Breathe out, and allow your focus of attention to move to your own mind and body. Breathe in, you. Breathe out, me.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

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Why Sleep is Central to Our Health and Performance

2/28/2022

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By Marilyn Erickson, MSN, APRN
(Part one of a three part series)
 
Several years ago, when I was struggling with sleep, getting only 3 to 4 hours on many nights, I confided in a friend who then gave me a quote from William Shakespeare to impress upon me the importance of sleep. The quote she gave me is “Sleep knits the careworn sleeve of time” taken from Shakespeare's, Macbeth.
 
It seems that in our modern world, we have the idea that sleep does not go hand in hand with productivity. In fact, some reports suggest that at least half of the US population is not getting enough sleep. 
 
The widely accepted range of needed sleep for adults is between 7 and 9 hours of sleep per night. So, if you think you can function on less than six hours of sleep per night, think again.
 
Since our brains are wired to ignore signs of sleep deprivation, many people get used to inadequate sleep and never really experience the damage this minimal amount of sleep is doing to our bodies and minds. 
 
What did Shakespeare mean in the quote about sleep? The line by Macbeth means that sleep is a soothing time that heals or sews up all the worries and stresses of the day. 
 
During sleep, our brains are firing and our bodies are repairing. Here are some of the ways:
 
Healthy Brain Function and Emotional Well-Being:

Sleep helps our brain work properly. It is forming new pathways to help you learn and remember information. 

Sleep deficiency alters activity in some parts of the brain contributing to problems in any of the following:

·making decisions
·solving problems
·controlling emotions and behavior
·coping with change

Sleep deficiency has been linked to:

·depression
·suicide
·risk-taking behavior
 
Physical Health:

Adequate sleep is involved in healing and repair of your heart and blood vessels. It helps maintain a healthy balance of hormones that make you feel hungry or full. The hormone, ghrelin, that makes you feel hungry and the hormone, leptin, that makes you feel full are out of whack where ghrelin goes up and leptin goes down. 
 
Sleep also affects how you react to insulin. Insulin is the hormone that controls your blood sugar level. When you don’t get enough sleep, you have a higher than normal blood sugar level. Increased blood sugar levels increase our risk for diabetes. 
 
In addition, your immune system requires sleep to stay healthy. If you are sleep deficient, you may have more difficulty fighting common infections. 
 
Adequate Sleep (7-9 hours) Means:

·enhanced immune function and disease resistance, helping you live longer
·increased energy and strength, so you feel and act more vibrantly
·improved weight loss and blood glucose regulation, helping you lose fat and improve your skin
·upgraded coordination and flexibility so you miss fewer steps and catch yourself when you do
·boosted hormone levels, so you recover faster and improve your fertility
·increased focus and creativity, so you can perform at your highest level
·enhanced memory and ability to learn complex skills, helping you retain what you learn
·improved emotion regulation, so you can keep your cool under stress
 
What About Inadequate Sleep? There are so many things at stake:

Longevity 
·your likelihood of developing diseases and chronic ailments increases - including obesity, depression, diabetes and cardiovascular disease.

Energy and resilience
·your tissue repair slows and lactic acid builds up faster

Weight and metabolism
·your weight loss shifts to shedding valuable muscle rather than fat

Immune function
·your immune system is disrupted and handicapped at reducing inflammation

Effective thinking
·your brain accumulates toxins that impair behavior and judgment and your critical decision-making center, the prefrontal cortex, shows reduced activity 

Reaction time
·your cognitive impairment is equivalent to being inebriated after 20 hours of being awake 

Memory function
·your brain’s ability to learn and create long-term memories is compromised

Regulation of emotion
·your brain’s emotional center, your amygdala, increases activity and you are more likely to overreact to social situations, like fighting with your friend or spouse
 
It is evident that sleep is critical for the health of your body, mind, and spirit.
 
As a way of helping you more objectively measure the quality of your sleep, it may be helpful to keep a log of how well you sleep each night or you may have a wearable device which tracks aspects of your sleep. Having a better idea of how well you are sleeping can be motivating for you to develop more healthy patterns in your life. 
 
Part 2 of this series (in a later edition of the CML newsletter) will highlight the strategies you can use (without medicine) to help you get a good night’s sleep. 
 
 
References:
Eugene, et al. The Neuroprotective Aspects of Sleep. MEDtube Science, March 3, 2015.
Kelly, et al. Sleep Tight: A Purpose for Sleep. Neurosurgery, February 1, 2014.NIH, National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute. Sleep Deprivation and Deficiency. December 13, 2021. 
Underwood, Emily. Sleep: The Brain’s Housekeeper? Science, October 18, 2013.
Worley, Susan. The Extraordinary Importance of Sleep. Pharmacy and Therapeutics, December, 2018.

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Our Guiding Words for 2022

1/31/2022

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BALANCE – Kara Cavel

 
My word for the new year is balance. Over the past year, I have had a difficult time holding the tension of the opposites. This year where this is sadness, I would like to also find joy where this is ugliness, I would like to find beauty, where there is hopelessness, I would like to find hopefulness.  Tolerating ambiguity and the complicated nature of all things is my approach to balance.  
 
LIVINGNESS – Laura Crosby

Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj shared, “There is something exceptional, unique, about the present event, which the previous or the coming do not have. There is a livingness about it, an actuality; it stands out as if illuminated. There is the ‘stamp of reality’ on the actual which the past and future do not have.” In this livingness I find a vivid intimacy with the wondrousness, the preciousness of life. (Emphasis added.)
 
CURIOSITY – Marilyn Erickson
 
Curiosity is an essential force of life!
In How to Do Nothing: Resisting the Attention Economy, Jenny Odell writes about curiosity as "bringing us out of step with the everyday"; like Alice going down the rabbit hole. It can be enjoyable. It can be frightening, We have it in childhood and, hopefully, retain it into adulthood. Because curiosity can orient us to something outside ourselves it has the potential to get us involved in something so much that we forget about ourselves, even if only for a moment. 
 
EMPTY – Louisa Foster

When the pandemic first began, I characteristically flew into action, trying to figure out how to get our programs and offerings online, how to keep our community connected, and get the information needed out to help everyone feel resourced and supported through the crisis. Two years in, I am more relaxed and realize how much of a need for empty space there is in my life. Space for non-directed thought. Space for creativity. Space for mystery and the Sacred. Emptiness invites possibility and silences ego. Emptiness will allow me to listen more closely to what is subtle, hidden, and sublime.

HOPE - Jenna Lopez
 
My word for 2022 is Hope. Living through the pandemic has brought many new challenges and struggles. The biggest challenge for me has been in maintaining some sense of Hope that things will get better. Hope that we will find ways to face these challenges together. Hope that whatever the new normal is going to be will involve a stronger and better sense of community. Being able to remain Hopeful in these times is a skill that I want to do a better job of cultivating in 2022.  
 
 
RECONSTRUCTION – Pamela Mueggenberg
 
Reconstruction (n): 1. the act or process of rebuilding, repairing, or restoring something.  2. the re-creation or reimagining of something from the past by using information acquired through research.  3. a process by which scientific principles and techniques are applied to physical evidence in order to create an accurate understanding of a past event.
 
I have chosen the word “reconstruction” for this year.  We are now two years in of a collective trauma, one that baffles the mind and stresses the body.  I would like to look back on this era of illness, fear, and conflict with a compassionate heart and nonjudgmental observation. I am going to make an effort to make some meaning of our experiences but also to help build a different future, one where we value common humanity and help each other heal and thrive. I'm also going to try and reconstruct my relationship with my body, a relationship that has been put on the back burner as I prioritized others during this pandemic - investing in self-care, meditation, movement, and a more mindful relationship with food will be a welcome change.  We’re not done with Covid yet, but reconstruction can begin before the trauma ends - and in fact might be what we need to end it.

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Health and Meaning

12/31/2021

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By Pamela Mueggenberg LMHP, MA Art Therapy Counseling

 
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” -Viktor Frankl
 
We are now entering a new phase in this pandemic - after two years of putting off routine appointments, teeth cleanings, and annual checkups we are all headed back to the doctor. 
 
In some ways this is a symbol of the hope we have that our lives are getting back to self-care and normalcy versus crisis and fear. Unfortunately, for many of us this means we have test results coming back, that point to newly discovered illnesses. An abnormal pap smear. A lump in the breast. Higher blood glucose. Liver enzymes.
 
By June 30, 2020 41% of adults in the US have delayed or avoided medical care due to concerns about Covid. Emergency room visits declined 42% during the same time period. The CDC estimates that 1,438 cancerous and precancerous lesion diagnoses were missed during the pandemic. Our bodies have been in a holding pattern through this quarantine, and are showing the effects of it.
 
We are slowly integrating the tides of Covid into our daily lives, and coming to see that other elements of our health require our attention. Oftentimes we equate health, or fitness of body, with a “good” life. What does it mean, then, when we get sick?
 
In 1997, Claire Wineland was born with cystic fibrosis and was originally given 10 years to live. With advances in medicine and her own strength of will, she was able to be a vibrant force of public education and advocacy for CF until her death in 2018. She described the 5 hours of breathing treatments a day, the 50 medications, over 30 surgeries in her lifetime, and the suffering that is a part of her life. 
 
Still, she says, “you can suffer and be okay. You can suffer and still make something. That the quality of your life isn’t determined by whether you’re healthy or sick or rich or poor, not at all, it’s determined by what you make out of your experience as a human being, out of the embarrassing moments and the painful moments. It’s what you make and what you give from that place.”
 
I invite you to take a look inward and see: what do you give, what meaning do you make from your life’s circumstances? Do you see your own suffering as isolating, or a window to see the pain in others? Does the weight of your own challenges make it harder to connect to others, or does it remind you of how fleeting and sacred those connections are? Have you discovered you are stronger, more afraid, more brave, less patient, kinder than you realized? 
 
How do you want to be? In your wisest moments, what do you want to give?
 
At some point in all our lives, we will get sick. What we do may have to change to accommodate our body’s new needs. But always remember, you are a transcendent being. Who you are is not limited to your physical health. How you make other’s feel, what beauty you create in the world, the people in your world that are better off because you are here, this transcends the bounds of your body. You are bigger than any one of these things, and to quote Ms. Wineland, you can be okay.

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Be Grateful to Everyone

11/30/2021

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By Daniel G. Weidner

 
Chapter nine of the book Start Where You Are by Pema Chodron (PC) is entitled “Be Grateful to Everyone”. She describes this Lojong slogan as “…about making peace with the aspects of ourselves that we have rejected.” Recently, as I was rereading this chapter, I could not help but reflect upon how my understanding of this slogan has changed over the last six years. 
 
During this time our country has experienced a U.S. Presidency and a global pandemic that have transformed or, perhaps, more vividly revealed our national self-concept. We now routinely see terms like confirmation bias, divided, polarized, racist, misogynistic, misinformation, lies, conspiracy, hateful, toxic, and ignorant used to describe the state of our country, or, more precisely, the people of our country. 
 
Many of us find ourselves significantly troubled by this state of affairs and wondering how we got here and what we are to do about it. I can’t help but wonder if this isn’t about making peace with the aspects of ourselves as a nation, that we have rejected, or at least tried very hard to ignore. 
 
Through the practice of Mindfulness we learn to use painful and unpleasant situations to deepen our practice. We learn to face our difficulties head-on with awareness, compassion, empathy, non-judgmentalism, and understanding. Through this practice our fears, emotional reactions, and unpleasant feelings are employed as grist for the mill. Ken McLeod (Reflections on Silver River) states that this practice provides a way to deepen our relationship with life itself by “…moving into the clear natural awareness that is the essence of human experience.” It all begins with awareness. 
 
He goes on to state that “Beliefs are reactions solidified into a worldview that cannot be questioned. Belief marks the line at which your ability to think rationally stops.” While he is speaking of this in terms of individuals, it seems to me that this can reasonably be understood to describe where we are as Americans. Beliefs are rigidly held and fortified through exposure to only that information that reinforces said beliefs – confirmation bias. We are acting and reacting with mindlessness. 
 
So, what to do about this? Frankly, on a macro level I don’t have any advice to offer regarding what the average citizen can do to improve or at least modify this state of affairs. However, on a micro level I understand that each of us as individuals can use the skills of mindfulness practice to create a better environment for ourselves and those around us. 
 
This begins with daily Meditation. Through Meditation we learn to observe our own thoughts and feelings. This observation then leads to awareness, increased understanding, and, over time, insight. Eventually we develop equanimity and begin to find both greater peace and balance in our lives. 
 
This, in turn, then begins to have a positive impact on those around us. This is how we are grateful to everyone. This is a continuous process that involves learning to live fully in the present moment, opening our minds and hearts to both ourselves and others in the present moment, and engaging in a “…continual journey of wakefulness.” (PC). Through this process we begin to surrender “…to situations in order to communicate rather than win.”(PC). And since all ships rise and fall together we find that being grateful to everyone makes the world a better place.

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I Got You

10/30/2021

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by Laura Crosby
 
Ordering vegetarian at a Midwest steak house is getting easier, but still has its awkward moments. It can be a little like wearing a bathing suit at a nude beach. The looks say, “Maybe you would be happier elsewhere.” The table conversation slows as my dinner companions brace for my order, wondering how… and why? The not-so-tiny voice in my head: “You’re so high maintenance. Always a bother.” 
 
This time was different. This time, three little words and the truth behind them changed everything. With a warm smile and knowing eyes, the server took my order, saying simply, “I got you.” And she did. 
 
It was a casual, off-the-cuff remark. Yet, against the backdrop of the situation and the world outside – where the dividing lines are growing deeper and more fraught – it felt to me like a real kindness. A genuine gesture of ally-ship.
 
I hear it more and more now. “I got you.” Also heard as, “Igotchyoo.” Listen for it. This subtle yet distinct offering of human compassion is sprinkled throughout many a place and day right here in our community. In a way, it’s radical in its unremarkable, even unconscious, activism.
 
While it can be heard as an insignificant turn of phrase, it points quite profoundly to a basic human need – one many of us are feeling more acutely right now. The need for connection and support. The need to know that we are not alone and that we care enough to listen to each other and try to understand, respect, and take care of each other. 
 
I got YOU. I got ME. I got US. It gently invites all in earshot to incline toward kindliness and care.
 
In that spirit, here is a big offering of “I got you” to everyone at the Center … all those in our sitting groups, workshops, study groups, retreats … our neighbors in Dundee and beyond … all the black lives that matter … all our LGBTQIA2S+ friends … black, indigenous, and people of color … those suffering around the world … and to our planet.
 
I got you. I really do.
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It's About to Get Sad

9/30/2021

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It’s About to Get S.A.D.
By Jenna Lopez, LICSW, LIMHP
 
As summer turns to fall, there is no amount of pumpkin spice that can keep the S.A.D.s at bay. If you do not know what the S.A.D.s are, allow me to explain.
 
Seasonal Affective Disorder is a type of depression that is related to changes in season, most commonly experienced in the fall to winter months, but for some can cause symptoms in spring through summer. If you are like me and experience a noticeable shift in your overall mood from about October to March, you may be going through the S.A.D.s too.
 
As a Midwestern born and raised, I used to believe that my yearly mood shift was simply me not being a fan of cold and snow. The older I got the harder it became to ignore how truly different I feel during the winter months.
 
Then I learned about S.A.D. and it put into perspective what I was experiencing. Lower energy levels, depressed mood more days than not, losing interest in activities, feeling irritable most days and feelings of hopelessness.
 
These symptoms start off mild and then increase in intensity as the months progress. Then like magic, they simply seem to disappear as the sun comes out and temperatures rise. 
 
The good news is that this brand of depression is predictable! When we know it is coming, we can have a plan. We can put that plan into place, practice and adjust it every year as we find what works and what doesn’t.
 
I thought I would share some of my plan in order to help others navigate managing their S.A.D.s:
  • Pro tip - do not invalidate yourself by brushing this off as a seasonal funk that you must tough out on your own. The reduced level of sunshine in fall and winter can affect our biological clocks (circadian rhythm) and our brains production of serotonin, a brain transmitter that affects mood.
  • I try to increase the frequency of my therapy appointments during these months, take a vitamin D supplement and most recently purchased a sun lamp (and loved it!) Vitamin D is what our body produces naturally when we get sunlight and can be taken in pill form.
  • A sun lamp can assist in managing those serotonin shifts and help keep our system more regulated.
 
This year’s goal in the battle against S.A.D.s is figuring out how to maintain my level of movement. I am a runner, and this is how I like to complete my stress cycles, but it never happens in winter.  This drop off in my movement means I am storing those stress cycles which increases the intensity of my symptoms of S.A.D.
 
Not this winter! I am determined to either invest in a treadmill, create a yoga routine at home, or pick up the old hand weights and start lunging.
 
I want to challenge you to try one new thing this S.A.D.s season and see how it makes you feel!
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Delayed Grief

8/30/2021

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By Pamela Mueggenberg, MA, LMHP, PCP

As I write this, I am sitting in a hotel chair, watching my baby nap on the bed next to me after meeting more family than he ever knew existed. We are traveling this weekend to celebrate the life of a beloved elder - one who died over six months ago.

In what is now a typical scene, we greet each other warmly, disclosing our vaccine status before sweeping into big hugs, and ask the most obvious question: how are you doing with all this after having to wait so long for us all to say good-bye? 

Delayed grief is a phenomena that developed alongside our capacity as a species to understand loss; when the emotional or physical pain of a loss is not acutely felt right away, but rather sneaks up on us months or years later. Before Covid, delayed grief was an individual response to complex loss, one where the griever had multiple, urgent stressors that required their attention.

A wonderful resource called “Grief In Common” lists some scenarios that might trigger this response:
  • losing a co-parent with small children
  • losing a parent immediately followed by the care of the remaining parent
  • losing someone while managing your own health concerns
  • losing a person and their income which leads to resource instability
  • loss during another big life event like a new job or divorce
  • the perceived responsibility to be the "strong one" to take care of others.

With a national quarantine effectively banning any public outpouring of physical connection and emotional consilience, we are now collectively experiencing delayed grief.

How can we fully sit with our loss if we are unable to perform the ritual of letting go? How can we be expected to process pain when we were navigating unemployment, illness, schooling disruption, resource instability or "just" the collective trauma of living through the worst pandemic in modern history?

The answer is, we can't. And we shouldn’t feel bad about that. Grief is nothing if not patient, and an exquisitely painful state of being that is needed to heal and integrate our life without our loved one.

Janet Weisiger lost her husband of 61 years in May 2020. She was able to set the date for his funeral service on May 8, 2021. She writes:

"I had thought in one year I would have experienced the painful reality of loneliness and precious memories, but that would have ended. Instead, the memories of 6l years of marriage came back in full force as I planned Dick's memorial service.... Now the memorial service is over. Dick's 90 years and 4 months have been re-lived, memories are permanently engraved in our minds, the joy of knowing him and loving him has been strengthened, and the grief has lessened. Closure is finally taking place."

I wish for all of you the same peace that Mrs. Weisinger is moving towards today. Remember, grief is hard but you are not alone. There is love around you, even if we have to wait to see it in person.
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A Reflection on Vicarious Resilience

6/30/2021

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By Kara Cavel, PhD, LCSW
 
As a clinician, I am familiar with the term 'vicarious trauma', or the impact clinicians experience working with individuals or groups of people who have experienced trauma. Recently, I read about vicarious resilience, the opposing force to vicarious trauma, and considered how this term might apply to me, to us right now. 
 
Vicarious resilience is the “process of observing and even being a part of a survivor’s healing process and their personal transformation from surviving to thriving” (Tenty as cited in Morgaine & Capous-Desyllas, 2014, p. 231). 
 
Is it possible to consider how we might serve as empathic listeners to those who share their stories of survival, especially among communities, families, and individuals who have experienced the death and devastating harm imposed by the worst public health and economic crisis experienced in generations? 
 
How does the act of listening to understand rather than listening to respond create the conditions that can move us from surviving to thriving? 
 
How does holding the truth of others teach us to hold our own truths? 
 
If you have the capacity to bear witness to stories of survival, could this help to facilitate conditions for healing for others? 
 
Conversely, if you can name and locate someone who can respond to your truth with understanding and empathy, is it possible to feel a shift toward healing?
 
Together, can we work toward finding a place to foster the conditions needed to pass along the truths of our experiences?
 
Together, let’s foster the experience of vicarious resilience.  
  
References
 
Morgaine, K. & Capous-Desyllas, M. (2014). Anti-Oppressive social work practice: Putting theory into action. Cognella Academic Publishing.

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Re-Entry Anxiety

5/30/2021

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By Nanci Nilles Psy.D.

Lately, I have heard the term “re-entry anxiety.” It is the apprehension some people have as the country moves to a post-pandemic phase. Mental health professionals have found a few themes present in these fears; a fear that a year of lockdown has decreased one’s social skills and a “lurking” fear one may contract or carry COVID19 variants to others. Symptoms of re-entry anxiety may include worrying about social situations, distractibility, and a desire to avoid others.
 
If you have never struggled with significant anxiety, such experiences are disconcerting and seemingly at odds with the lifting restrictions. If one has an anxiety disorder, re-entry anxiety may exacerbate existing worries. These more intense symptoms can feel like a significant setback. 
 
With its limited interactions with others and the absence of opportunity to travel, the past year resulted in repetitious days and solitary routines. Breaking these patterns, even when doing so is perceived in a positive light, may feel unsettling and cause anxiety. (Daily Briefing 2021.)
 
So what can we do to help ourselves cope with the re-entry anxiety? The first is to acknowledge the feeling of dread. Fear is difficult to ignore, and pushing away or trying to control it often makes it feel more intense. It is a paradox; by acknowledging anxiety's presence, we can exist with it more peacefully. 
 
We can also recall other changes we have navigated successfully. These memories build our self-confidence and remind us how often facing a challenging time leads to transformation. (Cuncic 2021.)
 
A practical approach is to set small, consistent goals for re-entry that allow for gradual exposure to anxiety-producing situations. Treating ourselves with self-compassion as we face what makes us uncomfortable is essential. There is no need to compare ourselves to what others are doing. By honoring our own pace, we practice gentleness towards ourselves, which also helps to lessen anxiety. (Dupont 2021.)

And lastly, if coping with re-entry anxiety feels like too much, it is ok to ask for assistance. Help can be increasing your support system, upping self-care, joining a support group, or seeking out treatment. Just know, it is ok to be anxious, and you need not navigate this passage alone. 

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